“Both optimists and pessimists contribute to the society. The optimist invents the aeroplane; the pessimist, the parachute.” —George Bernard Shaw (via periastrons)
is it just me, or is it not common courtesy to try and not fuck so loud if you know there’s someone in the room next to you, currently living there? especially if she’s complained about it before? am I alone here?
“Unfortunately, in America, babies are not found in cola cans. I asked my mother when I was four, and she said they came from eggs laid by rabbis. If you aren’t Jewish, they’re laid by Catholic nuns. If you’re an atheist, they’re laid by dirty, lonely prostitutes.” —Max Jerry Horovitz